| Acronym | Meaning |
| EI | Eating In - Intravenous Feeding |
| JDLR | Just Doesn't Look Right (something Is Wrong, But No Diagnosis Has Been Made Yet) |
| APD | Acute Prozac Deficiency (depression) |
| DPS | Dumb Parent Syndrome |
| FD | F*cking Drunk |
| IWB | Intercourse With Biscuits (F**king Crackers) |
| SWW | Sick, Wet And Whiny (infant) |
| FOS | Full Of Sh*t (either Severely Constipated Or Metaphorically) |
| JDFR | Just Doesn't Feel Right - Most Common Complaint Of LOL's (Little Old Ladies) And SOG's (Sick Old Guys) |
| ATFO | Asked To Fuck Off |